I (HEART) Huckabees (2004)

I am so happy I didn’t see this move in the theaters! I ♥ Huckabees is a strange comedy, the same type of slow-moving humor that made The Royal Tenenbaums so memorable.

A string of famous to very-famous actors is embroiled in an “existential investigation” that ends up being about a petty discord and corporate greed. At the same time, the life of a bunch of people is forever changed by the realization they are not living their own lives.

No, I mean, really, it’s as dry as it sounds. Most of it makes little sense, and it has the same surprisingly silly character that made Death Becomes Her such a delight – but with none of the fun.

The acting is understated throughout: Dustin Hoffman and Lily Tomlin remind one of another flop, the dreadful Meet the Fockers (where Hoffman’s partner was Barbra Streisand). Jason Schwartzman is the protagonist, but one really wonders what he’s doing amongst such heavyweights. Mark Wahlberg is less than credible as a firefighter in an existentialist dilemma (but then, it certainly is not his fault). Jude Law and Naomi Watts are a wonderful couple, and Naomi Watts sounds like spilling out her innards when she demands she doesn’t want to always have to be pretty.

And yet, the movie ironically doesn’t move. It neither moves forward, nor did it move me. It was, in the most existentialist fashion, but it never became. You can save a few scenes, but you could make a much better remake.